Yes, hello, good morning... ... - Yes, with pleasure... - When? -... - Next Friday? The 6th, right? -... - Oh no, I'm really sorry, I really can't -... - No, I'm on vacation, I'm really sorry. If there's another date I can arrange something -... - No? Sorry, if another date becomes available, please don't hesitate to call me back. Goodbye, Madam. ... Crazy, I just turned down an invitation from a top CEO all because in a week at the same time I'm planning to get whipped in a cellar dressed as a woman in front of strangers.... ...10 minutes later I'm offered a new appointment for Wednesday the 11th ;-) D-7: I admit I'm not 100% sure I'll have the courage to show up at the door, but the experience is so tempting... and I don't dare back out anymore. Madam kindly followed up with me by email. It's decided, I can't back out now, the die is cast... H-6: I took the afternoon off, my bag with my things is packed, I'm having trouble concentrating on my work, a mix of fears, anxiety, curiosity, and also a contradictory desire to overcome all of this. H-1: I drove by to check out the entrance I'd previously seen on Google Street View, a small recessed door with no distinguishing features, is this the right one? I can feel my heart racing... really fast. In my head, two little voices are calling to each other – "You'll see, it's going to be an incredible feeling! You're so lucky, you won't find better for a first time. She's really kind, sweet, and absolutely beautiful! I assure you, I'm sure you can trust her, it'll be fine. Besides, she said there's no one there in the afternoon, you're worrying for nothing. Plus, she's already prepared everything. The hostess who's supposed to greet me is very friendly, apparently." And the other little voice: "No, don't go, there's still time to turn back. Go for a walk, the weather's nice. You don't realize, you've always had a rule: never in a club, never in public. Now you're combining everything: submission, public, etc..." I park my car under the nearby town hall. I have an hour to wait, too much stress. I grab my laptop and go work in the bar across from the town hall. I think I I've never dealt with so many emails in one hour! It's time, my heart is racing again, I'm heading back to my car to exchange my bags. I walk slowly towards the address, where I expect a charming hostess…